Frequently Asked Questions/Statements in the Fragrance Community

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Hello, ladies and gents! I am glad you decided to stop by today. I hope you are having a wonderful day. I am doing well, but I am feeling quite sarcastic today, so I decided to make this post. So yes, be forewarned, many of these answers will probably be sarcastic and in a joking manner. Some will have literal answers. I trust you to be able to tell the difference.

I see the same questions asked and statements made day in and day out in groups. I just wanted to answer some or give a sarcastic answer to them that is still truthful. I am not against people asking questions, but maybe this will help a few people. If nothing else, it might make you laugh...At least you will laugh at me, not because I am humorous, but because my sense of humor is pathetic and you pity me. Either way, I hope you get some enjoyment out of this. Take the humor with a grain of salt. Let's get into it!


1. Fragcomm: Guys, I just bought this fragrance and I have it in my hand. What do you think of it?

Me: I don't know, man. You have it and not me. Why would I tell you your own opinion on it?


2. Fragcomm: Here is my collection. What do you think I should add next?

Me: There are thousands of fragrances available. Most people are going to suggest what Jeremy talks about, so just go watch him and skip the onslaught of comments that will be unleashed on you about Eros, Ultra Male, La Nuit de L'Homme, Aventus, and Sauvage. Either that, or go to the store and smell some stuff and see what your style is. Our noses aren't your noses.


3. Fragcomm: I blind bought this fragrance because of a reviewer saying it was good and I hate it.

Me: Stop watching reviewers that tell you to blind buy without sampling first. That reviewer's nose isn't yours. Go on your own scent journey, not theirs. Most of us have already learned the lesson about blind buying because of reviews. We have all been there.


4. Fragcomm: What should I buy from these fragrances that everyone has?

Me: Again, our nose isn't yours. Most of these mass appealing fragrances can be found at your local mall and you can find samples everywhere. We don't know what your tastes are.


5. Fragcomm: I don't get compliments with these (insert compliment monster) fragrance.

Me: There are so many factors that play into this. How you present yourself is pivotal. If you are wearing Black Afgano with a white suit, then you probably won't. Also, be a nice guy. No one wants to talk to a jerk.


6. Fragcomm: This fragrance performs terribly on my skin!

Me: Maybe you oversprayed and can't smell it. Our noses can't always pick up certain notes. Fragrances like Guerlain L'Homme Ideal Cologne is said to have bad performance, but it has a musky and somewhat powdery dry down. Not everyone can detect light musks.

Also, try looking at vintage fragrance or Arabic ones. People keep buying these fast money flankers and hype beasts and wonder why houses make fragrances that don't perform. The short answer is: they can get away with it because you keep buying them.


7. Fragcomm: What is your favorite tobacco fragrance?

Me: Please don't say i...

Fragcomm: Herod

Me: /facepalm


8. Fragcomm: Is Ultra Male a "panty-dropper"? (excuse the term)

Me: Yes. If you walk by the women's underwear aisle in Wal-Mart they will stop what they are doing with a look of vivid bewilderment and drop that package of undergarments and wonder why you are wearing such a strong women's perfume.

(This is a total joke. To each their own)


9. Fragcomm: Is Aventus a boxer-dropper?

Me: I have no idea. My guy friends keep their boxers on around me.


10. Fragcomm: Aventus is the king!

Me: So much for democracy...


11. Fragcomm: Why spend your money on clones when you can get the real thing?

Me: Because I don't tell people how to spend their money. It's of no concern to me.


12. Fragcomm: Why spend money on an expensive fragrance when clones are cheaper?

Me: Because I don't tell people how to spend their money. It's of no concern to me.

( I have now started two sentences with "because". I might be going mad)


13. Fragcomm: What fragrance do women find irresistible?

Me: I don't know. I am a man. I stopped trying to figure out women years ago. I can't even figure myself out. My cat has me stumped too. Maybe you should ask a woman.


14. Fragcomm: I wore CDNIM and didn't get any compliments. What gives?

Me: *Smirks* and scrolls on by.


15. Fragcomm: What are you wearing today?

Me: *Sniffs my wrist*...draws a blank. Man, I am getting old...


16. Fragcomm: Creed uses all naturals!

Me: Let me show you the way, young grasshoppa.


17. Fragcomm: I want a natural fragrance that projects 50 feet and lasts 38 hours.

Me: Good luck finding that, bud.


18. Fragcomm: Does this $25 fragrance have real oud?

Me: Oh, boy...


19. Fragcomm: Why do reviewers get free bottles?

Me: Why aren't you putting in the work to review yourself? It's not that easy. The same people who request for us to spend our money and get what they want us to review are asking us why we get free bottles? I don't see how people fail to see the irony there...


20. Fragcomm: What should I wear for a date tonight?

Me: Whatever you like. Wear a fragrance that embodies you.


21. Fragcomm: Is this bottle real?

Me: Don't buy fragrances from companies or people if you have a doubt that they will be real. If you are that paranoid about it, buy from official retailers.

Also, stop telling people everything is fake because someone else did. If you think it's fake, then say why you do.


22. Fragcomm: What is the best boozy smell?

Me. The smell of sobriety


23. Fragcomm: I don't care about how it smells. I want to know about performance!

Me: Why are you even here? I care about how my vehicle looks and runs. They are both important.


24. Fragcomm: New collector, how am I doing?

Fragcomm: Noobs

Me: *shrug* everyone started somewhere. He was only looking for a bit of support.


25. Fragcomm: You posted your SOTD in 4 groups! Stop spamming us with your posts!

Me: If you don't like it, then you could have hit the block button in less time than it took you to write that.


26. Fragcomm: I hate drama, so I am posting a dramatic post about people being dramatic.

Me: Must...resist...urge..to...meme...

Fighting fire with fire only makes it worse.


27. Fragcomm: What is the best fragrance that smells like weed?

Me: Yeah, we already know that you smell like weed. You don't need a fragrance for it.


28. Fragcomm: I hate (insert random note)!

Me: Well, people thought the Titanic was unsinkable until it sunk. Opinions can change quickly given the right circumstance.


29. Fragcomm: I am going to a funeral and I nee...

Me: Just stop there. Wear something clean or nothing. You don't want that fragrance to take away from honoring someone's life. That is a scent they will remember for the rest of their lives. Same goes for a wedding. Be respectful for other people's special days.


30. Fragcomm: John, why do you make dumb articles like this?

Me: I was bored. Sometimes I let my sarcasm get the best of me and I think a few people might get a chuckle out of it.


Conclusion 

I hope you enjoyed this. Remember that most of these are sarcastic or a joke. Just relax.

I hope you enjoy your day and you are blessed. Remember to say a kind word to someone(or a sarcastic joke) to make someone's day. It's free!

Racism sucks. Let's pray for everyone to be treated equally and fairly.

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